Relationships . . . how are yours?

Have you ever been bullied, or have ever bullied someone? Have you ever stood by while someone was being treated unkindly, or do you step up to help? 

Recently I wrote a book for children and adolescents called, Growing a better me . . . healing the hurt that causes bullying and being bullied. It is currently available on Amazon.

Please stop by the website!  Writing the book was inspired by a desire to offer another approach to helping children who bully as well as are being bullied to find a way to heal the hurt that is causing the behavior.  

Baby bullies that grow up to be big bullies contribute to much of the discord we see in the workplace, in families, between  and among groups, countries, and even strangers. I believe that if we are able to support our youth in healing the hurt that is causing the unkind behavior we can help them create a productive, happy life in the future.

Last year I wrote a book about relationships called, Find Love at Last! 7 steps to Attracting the Sweetest Love you have ever Known, to help women become the love they are seeking in a love relationship because I believe that it is not possible to have what we want any other way.   Although this book doesn’t speak directly about bullying or being bullied, it does address how we as women allow ourselves to be treated, how we treat ourselves, and how we treat others based on our belief about what is possible for us. It addresses how the absence of feeling worthy of having a happy, healthy, prosperous life with the sweetest love we have ever known, keeps us from having it.  Although the book was written for women, it can be helpful for men.

Where do you begin with creating change in a behavior that has gone on for years?  We have to start with ourselves.   

  • We start with being aware of what we think, how we feel and how we behave.
  • We start taking more control over where we focus our thoughts and energy, as well as how we want to feel and express ourselves.
  •  We begin to take steps toward telling and living a different story; a story that supports our wellbeing and the wellbeing of others.
  • We make a personal committ to teach by example.
  • We acknowledge and allow ourselves to feel our own worthiness and value so that we can see these innate values in others, and help him or her see these things in themselves.

Change is also possible when there are people who believe in themselves enough that they are able to see the untapped potential in others; to see what others cannot see in themselves and to share their amazing vision with them.

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Heart to Heart on Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is for everyone! Whether you have a sweet love, want a sweet love, or just enjoy meeting people and creating new friendships, today, like every other, belongs to you . . . infused with a little something extra.

Today gives us a reason to make an effort to express our love, care, and appreciation to everyone who touches our heart in a special way; who somehow participates in making us a better person, or reminds us how truly awesome we are, especially during those moments when we forget.

Today is a selfless day.  A day where the energy of love flows not just through the gift of dark chocolates, a dozen red roses, an amazing dinner, a gift of diamonds for her, or something wonderfully sweet for him. It is about letting people in your life know how much you appreciate them, what they mean to you, and how your world is a better place because they are a part of it. 

It invites us to step outside what would seem to be an all consuming self -absorbed lifestyle filled with worry, or fear about what is, or may not be, and to think about all the amazing people in our life who have touched our heart and let them know they have, and if we have the words, to tell them how.  Who might that be for you?

Our appreciation reaches beyond our immediate family, and friends as we take notice of all the people who contribute to enhancing the quality of our life.  What about the person who cuts your hair, does your dry cleaning, or delivers your mail? How about the cashier that you have come to know at the grocery market, or the 7eleven?

Love . . . when you feel it, you are experiencing the most amazing energy flowing through every cell in your body; the essence of the truth of who you are.  It infuses every word you say, everything you do, and your every thought. It infuses every intention you have to improve the life of another, including your own, and not just on Valentine’s Day.  The most precious thing of all is that this sweet expression of love doesn’t cost one penny.

This is a day to make an effort to let people know you ‘see’ them . . . not with your eyes, but with your heart. Share the love!

Make everyday Valentine’s Day!

From my heart to yours,

Lee Ann Hawkins

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Does Money Influence Attracting or Having Sweet Love?

 Unemployment has reached an all time high the last past two years with many people struggling to meet the basic needs of living.  If you are currently without employment, or have concern about how you are going to make ends meet, take heart. There is a way to feel better about your situation, and improve it. This article will provide tips on how to do that.

Knowing how you feel about money; making it, saving it, spending it, having it given to you, as well as giving it away, will give you valuable information about yourself, and the impact the energy of money has on your love relationships. You may have some beliefs that are hindering your ability to change your financial situation to one that better suits you.   The questions below may give you insight into the thoughts, and attitudes you have that are governing how you approach, and feel about having financial security, as well as how you may be preventing the flow of money into your life.

There are no right answers. Be objective, kind and compassionate with yourself. You may discover insights about yourself that will change how you approach the energy of money for yourself, and in your relationship with another. Let’s begin . . .

  • What do you say to yourself or to others about your financial situation?
  • How does whatever you think or say about your financial situation make you feel?
  • Have you noticed that what you think and say about your situation is the reality you are living? This is the Law of Attraction in Action.
  • How do you behave in response to the things you say to yourself, or others about your situation, and the way it makes you feel? For example . . .
  • Does your focus on what you do not have, influence whether you date or not?
  • Does the fear about your financial future influence your decision to date one person over another?

3 tips to help you get to the other side . . .

  • Remember the truth of who you are: divine, valuable, worthy.
  • Think and talk about what you want. not about the reality of your current situation. As difficult as it may be, it is imperative that you tell the story that you want to live, and place your attention there with emotions that support it. This is the Law of Attraction in Action.
  • Listen to your heart as it guides, and inspires you to do what is necessary to achieve the manifestation of your desires around this topic.  Your prosperity, as your health, and experiencing the love, and joy you desire is your birthright. Own it.

This article contains experts from my book, Find Love and Last! 7 Steps to Attracting the Sweetest Love You Have Ever Known!  

Find Love at Last! is available on  and .


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Health . . . What’s Love Got to Do With It? Article 3 of a 4 part series of the Four Life Levels

The first and second articles of this 4 part series discussed Self-Expression and Relationships. This article discusses the fourth life level: Health.

It is very difficult if not impossible to enjoy any aspect of your life fully, let alone attract a sweet love, when a healthy body is not part of your experience. There are three aspects of health that influence ones over all well-being: emotional, physical, and spiritual. An imbalance in one area creates an imbalance in the other areas.

Have you ever noticed that the quality of your health often determines the quality of relationship you attract, have, or if you have one at all?

Have you also noticed that the more you focus on the physical challenge, the bigger it becomes, and that experiencing the other side of it may not occur to you? With your focus on what is not wanted, experiencing the health you desire is not an option. This is the Law of Attraction in Action.

Take a look at your life . . . your physical, and emotional health, as well as your ability to create, and attract the desires of your heart, including the sweetest love. How is it going for you?

 What has your experience been in attracting love when you are not feeling good in your physical body? How about when your thoughts and emotions keep you in a state of worry, frustration or fear? Weight was discussed in the article, To Date or to weight . . the stress of being the perfect weight for the perfect dateand it is worth repeating here. How often has your weight and how you feel about the skin you’re in kept you from living your life on your terms?

If having perfect health is your desire, the brief introduction below will get you on your way from here to there.  If the steps presented are new or unfamiliar to you, I invite you to open your heart to consider this approach. Personally, I believe there is no other way.

This approach affords no room for mediocrity; it is the path of practicing a heart focused life style that gets you in alignment with the truth of who you are, making the best all things wanted available to you.  Let’s begin.

The physical body responds to the predominate thoughts and emotions you have. If your thoughts are predominately positive, your body experiences health and wellbeing on every level.

When predominate thoughts and emotions are negative, filled with worry, fear, anger, resentment, or any negative emotion in between, healing of the body is slowed, incomplete, or delayed. (more about the power of thought in future articles).This is The Law of Attraction in Action.

Every acquired physical aliment is usually born in response to the predominate thoughts and emotions you have about yourself, and your life experience.

The article The Mind, Body and Spirit of Attracting the Sweetest Love, discusses how this trilogy works together for better or worse, and in accordance with the quality of one’s thoughts and emotions. The power of thought and emotions will be discussed in later articles more fully, however for now that it is the fuel of life experiences.

Having said that, when you are in harmony with the Spirit You, your vibration is high and doesn’t match the lower vibrations that support illness, which is the vibration of any negative emotion. In this state of being, illness is not an option. In this sweet state of being you are also in harmony with the sweet love you desire; the sweet love that is you. 

Want better health, more joy, and sweet love?  Here are a few tips to help you with that.

  • Start where you are
  • Accept where you are
  • Appreciate where you are
  • In your state of appreciation, focus on how you want to feel in your body and see yourself feeling inspired to do whatever it is to get you where you want to be,  for your sake, not to get the guy. Sweet love is come once self-love is intrinsically experienced in your life.

This article contains experts from my book, Find Love and Last! 7 Steps to Attracting the Sweetest Love You Have Ever Known!  

Find Love at Last! is available on  and .

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Relationships: How they Impact the Quality of Love Relationships we Attract, Keep, Lose, or Leave Behind. Article 2 of 4

This four part series discusses each of the Four Life Levels and their impact on attracting the sweetest love you have ever known. The first article discussed the first life level: Self-Expression. This article will discuss the second life level: Relationships

Every relationship you have is influenced by how you feel about yourself independent of anyone else as well as how you express yourself in the world based on this profoundly essential relationship. This is where it all begins.  Parents, friends, family, co-workers, even strangers you pass on the street, sit next to on the bus, or stand behind you at the food market have the potential of influencing how you feel in the moment.  It is truly amazing how quickly our happy disposition can be transformed into feelings of anger, frustration, humiliation, or fear at the drop of another’s words or actions.

Having said that, how we express ourselves with others is usually a good indicator of how we might show up in a relationship that we want to last a lifetime.  How could it be any other way?

If you find yourself taking the behaviors of others to heart, saying yes when you want to say no,  need to always have things your way, or have difficulty forgiving yourself or others. . . expressing the other side of these behaviors when you meet someone who makes your heart sing will be almost impossible.  In fact, the more important the person is to you, the more likely you will find yourself behaving in ways that do not support the kind of love you want at all, especially when you are confronted with situations or circumstances that stir up  negative emotions that you are not sure how to manage, reduce, or resolve.

As you nurture the relationship you have with yourself, the promise of a sweet lasting love is yours, along with healthier relationships with your family, friends, co-workers, and people you have brief encounters with.  Not sure where to begin?

Here are 5 tips to help you with that . . .

  • Remember who you really are; divine, worthy, valuable
  • Identify the behaviors you find yourself participating in that hurt your relationships with others
  • Identify what you think and feel before saying or doing something you will later regret or creates anxiety in you
  • Be compassionate with yourself as you begin to uncover behaviors that up until now have been preventing you from having the absolute most amazing love you have ever known
  • Get grounded and  heart focused  as you ease back into the truth of who you are before reacting from a place that is impulsive, nonproductive, and the result of past experiences that hurt and you will ultimately regret.

This article contains experts from my book, Find Love and Last! 7 Steps to Attracting the Sweetest Love You Have Ever Known


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How is the Baseline of Your Four Life Levels Without Love? Article 1 of 4

How do you feel about, and express yourself independent of anyone else or everything else, your relationships with others, your health, and your state of prosperity? In other words . . . what is the quality of your Four Life Levels without a love relationship in it?  This article will discuss the first life level, Self-Expression, and its influence on the quality of your relationships and life, as well as the first steps towards creating something better for yourself. First, a brief summary of The Four Life Levels.

The Four Life Levels

The Four life levels are: Self-Expression, Relationships, Health, and Prosperity. Having or not having a love relationship, as well as the quality of relationship you attract is influenced by how well you manage whatever is going on in other areas of your life. You cannot separate or isolate these levels. An imbalance in one influences the quality of the others.  Here is the first of the four life levels.


Your self-expression is born out what you believe to be true about yourself and how you express this truth in your life. Without exception.  It is an acceptance of, and an appreciation for, all that you are and all that you are becoming. It is knowing that . . .

  • No matter how bad you may feel or how awful something may seem, the experience you find yourself in does not define you. When you know that, you express yourself in ways that support you.
  • You are an extension of God, the Universe, the essence of love itself.
  • It is remembering that mistakes are what you do and not who you are.  

When your self-expression is heartfelt, people feel it. Here are 3 of 8 or more potential ways heart-felt expression shows up:

  • You are able to be true to yourself and others, to do the kind thing or the right thing whether there is an eye on you or not
  • You begin to reinterpret a failed relationship as an experience that offered you an opportunity to grow or get more clarity of what you want.
  • You take credit for who you are becoming along with the choices you have made that brought you to this place in your life.

 Want more love in your life? Remember you are divine, worthy and valuable; the essence of the love you seek. Your behavior doesn’t, and never will change that.

This article contains excerpts from my book, Find Love at Last! 7 Steps to Attracting the Sweetest Love You Have Ever Known, and can be purchased on

Article 2 of this 4 article series on the Four Life Levels will be:  Relationships and love. What’s the Connection.

Tag: How does your relationship with family, friends and co-workers influence the quality of love you have in your life?

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Want a Sweet Love in Your Life? Be it!

This year belongs to you. It’s yours to create whatever your heart desires. Every day you have an opportunity to start over if the day before did not go as well as you hoped it would.  If you do not wait until tomorrow to start over, begin the very moment you are aware that you are not feeling, thinking or doing the things that support the sweet love you want and the incredible life you want to live.

If you want a sweet love, and feel it doesn’t exist take heart because it does. You do not have to settle for less than what you want.  In fact, 2011 can be the year you find yourself head-over-heels in love!  Want a sweet love in your life? Then be it. Be the essence of the love you want, and in fact are, and the promise of attracting it in your life is absolute.

To get from here to there, take a look at some of the beliefs, thoughts, and behaviors that often get in the way.

The various explanations a woman may give herself or others about the reason(s), or ‘excuse(s)’ for the relationships she finds herself in that are a struggle for her, do not work out, or end before they have the chance to get started are varied.  These occur under different circumstances, and at times, it would seem, happen for no apparent reason at all!  Regardless of the story, the underlying source is always the same, consistently supports what she believes is possible for her, and how she feels about herself, and is ultimately expressed, or played out in her life regardless of what she may say she wants. It resides in a how worthy she feels she is to have the sweet love she desires.

Some of the thoughts that may get in the way of attracting a sweet love, fully enjoying her current relationship, or may prevent her from moving forward after a break-up may be . . .   

“He is/was too this, too that, he doesn’t’/didn’t do this, or that right, or at all, I don’t/didn’t like how he does/did, says/said, or feels/felt about this or that or me”.  

If these thoughts run through your mind, buttons are being pushed in you; buttons that need your attention if having the sweetest love is what you truly desire.

It’s a wonderful opportunity to get to the bottom of whatever it is before it ruins the relationship you have, or keeps you from ever experiencing the kind of love you want. 

For example, a few of the common feelings that are often triggered once a relationship has gotten started may include; jealousy, neediness, insecurity, or having a need to control the person. How a woman manages or expresses these emotions when they do show up, have the potential of being a deal breaker, or alternatively, an opportunity for growth for her, either in her present relationship, or in a future one.  

The same goes for the guy. A man’s behavior is also subject to change after a relationship gets started, and he is not exempt from experiencing these universal emotions, along with feeling doubt, and uncertainty of how to remove himself from a relationship that he realizes isn’t a good fit for him after he has made a commitment. Understanding how a woman and a man manage these universal emotions has the potential of helping both sexes in identifying and addressing behaviors that can ultimately hurt the possibility of creating a sweetest love situation in a current relationship or attracting one.     

Here are five questions to help assess what may be getting in the way of attracting a sweet love, or preventing you from being the love that you are. Let your heart respond to the questions below, and see what comes up for you. 

  • How does the thought of having the love relationship you have always wanted make you feel?
  • What thoughts and feelings do you have that get in the way of feeling optimistic about having a relationship that is perfect for you? 
  • How do you behave when you are in a relationship that isn’t working, and do not know how to leave?
  • How do you behave when you are afraid the relationship you are in may end?
  • How do you feel being in a love relationship will make your life better?

How did it go? Whatever your answers, it’s perfect. Perfect because what you wrote is where you are with yourself as you think about love relationships and having one of your own, or wanting to make the relationship you are in better.  The more aware you are of where you stand on this delicious topic, the more empowered you will be to move through the challenges of your life experiences that have, up to now, prevented you from attracting the sweetest love or creating a sweetest love situation in the  relationship you are currently in! 

The article includes excerpts from Find Love at Last! 7 Steps to Attracting the Sweetest Love You Have Ever Known and originated from my personal blog:  My book, Find Love at Last can be purchased at My Store through

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To Date or to weight . . . the stress of being the perfect weight for the perfect date.

Does your weight ever influence your readiness to look for love, or to move forward in a relationship when love has found you?

Have you ever made a promise to yourself to lose the weight you determined was necessary to date only to find that you were unable to achieve your goal, and if you did, you would soon gain the weight back, and maybe a few pounds extra?

What is happening here?

The answers may vary, however the fundamental reasons are the same . . . When you  put your life on hold it is because on some level you do not feel good enough , or worthy enough to participate in the very thing that would bring you joy.  In this case,  having a sweet love.

Let’s take Jessica for example.  The thought of what it would feel like to have someone special in her life makes her feel so good until she takes a look at herself  in the mirror.  “How could anyone I want to date find me attractive?”  Do you ever feel discouraged or frustrated at the reflection starring back at you, and then use this reflection as an excuse to put off dating until you are what you believe would be the perfect size?

Jessica’s weight was a lifelong struggle. The more she focused on it, the more it consumed her. Everything she did was influenced by how she felt about her physical body, and how she perceived herself being ‘seen’ by others.  The more she focused on her weight the more of an issue it became for her. This is The Law of Attraction in Action.  It absorbed a phenomenal amount of her mental, emotional, and physical energy.  Not to mention the cost of depending on things outside herself in an attempt to make her situation better; the latest diet pill, diet, or work out that promised amazing results.  It was a major distraction for her; a distraction that made being totally present in any area of her life not an option for her. Have you ever been there, done that?  How did it work out for you?

For Jessica, not so well.  She realized it was time to tell a different story; one that supported what she wanted in her life. She began to look at her body differently;

Appreciating it, and accepting every pound.  In accepting her weight, she was accepting herself.  In her self-acceptance, she felt inspired to make changes because she knew it would make her feel better,  This meant reassessing what I call the Trilogy of Health and Wellness; emotional management, healthy nutritional choices, and body movement.

Her focused was now about what felt acceptable to her, not about what was acceptable to someone else.  With this attitude she not only achieved her desired weight, she met someone who loved all of her; mind, body, and soul.

The differentiator is not how much you weigh; it is whether or not you feel happy and healthy in the skin you’re in whether you have a love in your life or not. Do you?  If not, here are 8 tips that will help change that.

  • Address your stress; in your relationship with yourself, your friends, family, and co-workers, with your health, and your finances, as well as the stress you feel about not having a relationship and wanting one.  Address whatever it is that create s anxiety for you. 
  • Reassess you nutritional choices. Are you supporting or sabotaging your desire to have a healthy body, be a healthy weight, and have a sweet love?
  • Reassess your body movement. Are you giving your body the movement it needs to support you in living a happy and fulfilled lifestyle?
  • Appreciate your body; the weight it is, the health you have, and all the you are able to experience in your life because of it.
  • Find something about your body that you love, and focus on that.
  • Remember the truth of who you are; valuable, worthy, and divine.
  • You are not your weight, your worry, or any nonproductive behavior you may participate in, in an attempt to feel better .
  • Be compassionate with yourself as you take responsibility for, and if necessary, forgive yourself for the choices you have made that have up until now, delayed the manifestation of your goals.

You do not have to wait to date. You can love yourself right into the sweetest love relationship you have ever known while you are making changes in your life that support what you want, how you want to feel, and how you want to live your life.

This article contains excerpts from my book, Find Love at Last! 7 Steps to Attracting the Sweetest Love You Have Ever Known, available on

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The Sweetest Love

Sara wanted the sweetest love relationship she had ever known. A relationship that would make her heart sing, and make her beloved’s heart sing for her. She wanted the feeling of being in love every day. As she thought about having what she wanted, she could feel sensations of excitement, anticipation, and optimism swirl through every cell in her body.

She decided to make a list of all the things she felt would make up the sweetest love for her.  As she sat down to write, all the enthusiasm she felt as she thought about the amazing relationship she wanted to have, lost its magic. Question: What happened here?

Answer: Sara got lost in the emotional joy her dreams invoked in her; feeling no limitations to what she wanted.  In her joy she was in a state of Grace, where anything is possible, and unfortunately for most, including Sara, it doesn’t last. Why?  Our fears snap us back to reality as we start reciting quietly or out loud all the reasons why what we want is not possible; a reality that, whether we like it or not, will continue to repeat itself if we do not deliberately participate in creating something different. 

This is what happened with Sara.  She started thinking about all the relationships she had that didn’t work out, and felt a rush of despair come over her, “how could I make the next relationship different?”

Many women, like Sara, want to create a sweetest love experience, and up until now, have not known how. If you want to attract the sweetest love you have ever known, the first step is to write the Sweetest Love Wish List. 

Here are three tips to writing your list:

  • Before writing all the things you want in a sweet love, make a list of things that didn’t feel good to you, or that you didn’t like in past relationships. Here’s why.  So often it is the things that hurt in the past that prevent us from creating something sweeter in our future. If this is the case for you, identifying the things you did not like will help you be more specific in identifying what you want instead of what you had. For some, this may not be enough to feel at peace about the situation, or the person involved in whatever it was, and it’s a start.  If there is someone specific that you are having trouble forgiving, write his name down next to the situation, or behavior. (In later articles I will address the power of forgiveness in attracting the sweetest love). If you are in a relationship now that isn’t going well, do the same thing; list what doesn’t feel good about it, and next to each situation, what you want instead.
  • Take a look at all the things you wrote.  Now, on your Sweetest Love Wish List write what you want instead along with anything else you would like to experience in your sweetest love.
  • Below each wish, write how you feel it would make your life better. This step creates a sense of ownership of each wish.

For successful manifestation of your wish list:

  • Believe that whatever you are going to write is possible for you; suspend doubt.
  • Write in present tense. The unconscious mind cannot tell the difference between what is real and what is not, however plays a very strong role in the creation of whatever it is you place your attention on, infusing that is with the quality of emotion you feel as you place your attention to it. Having said that, be in a happy, optimistic place with yourself as you list your wishes!

The next article: The Law of Attraction and having the Sweetest Love You have Ever Known.

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The Sweetest Love Resolution for the New Decade . . . Forgiveness

“I’m so angry, hurt, and in shock over what you did, he did, she, or they did! I will never forgive you, him, her, or them again!” 

Have you ever said that, thought that, felt that? Have you ever held someone responsible for your situation and the way it made you feel? Are you still? What has been the longest time you have ever held on to feeling justified in your rage, anger, or hurt? What impact did, or does holding on to these negative emotions have on you emotionally, physically, or perhaps spiritually?

Your mind, heart, and body feel incredibly stressed when you resist forgiving or being forgiven.  Holding on to anything that doesn’t feel good isn’t natural, and that is why ‘holding on’ feels so uncomfortable. When I ask for forgiveness, it is to get relationships back on track after they have been wounded through some level of perceived betrayal or expectation that wasn’t met. I believe it is about asking someone to excuse our humanity or moment of indiscretion. Does the person who is feeling the betrayal really need an apology or be asked to be forgiven for forgiveness to happen? I say not. How about healing? Does there have to be an apology for healing to happen. I say not.

If you think ‘yes,’ the challenge is that the person you may need an apology from may not want to apologize, may be unwilling to give or receive it, or may no longer be alive. What do you do then?

When you look outside for the healing you need and can’t get it, you have no choice but to find a way to heal the hurt yourself or it will potentially impact every aspect of your life. Forgiveness is one of the most powerful tools to help you do that.  Here are at least 3 reasons why:

  • Whether you know it or not, agree with it or not; when you forgive another you are doing it for your sake, not for the sake of the person you are forgiving.
  • Forgiveness is a choice. You can’t feel negative emotion like anger and resentment as well as positive emotion like love or forgiveness at the same time. It is physiological impossible.
  • The only way to bring peace back into your heart is to forgive the person you feel has caused you emotional or physical pain, and if it applies, to forgive yourself for your part in it; for not ‘seeing’ or appreciating the person you hold responsible; not standing up for yourself, or a friend, for not acting in ways that support what you want for yourself and in your life. Forgive yourself for all of it.

Feel lighter, stronger, more focused, and alive. Feel more optimistic about your life, and all that you want to create and experience in this coming year, and into this next decade!

Place your energy and attention there; energy and attention that is now available as a result of all the new space you created in your heart by forgiving, and letting go of all the extra weight from the thoughts and feelings that do not serve you.

To the most amazing, New Year filled with the sweetest love, incredible health, wealth, and abundance in all things that bring your heart joy!


Lee Ann Hawkins

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